Based on suggestions from the community, I have divided the spaces for survivors of sexual abuse into three sections.

For women: https://lemmy.world/c/rape

For men: https://lemmy.world/c/MenGetRapedToo

For families and friends: https://lemmy.world/c/rapeallies

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[–] 32 points 1 day ago* (9 children)

As a completely un-related person flying by with no stake in this, this feels unnecessary. For one, the usual recommendation in the Threadiverse is to combine niche subs to try and keep some life in them. Do we really need three subs for this? On a more personal note, I don't like that this re-inforces / reminds people of the "men can't be raped" rhetoric. How about just ban anyone who makes such a stupid point on the main comm?

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  • [–] [S] 7 points 1 day ago (8 children)

    It's a request for numbers of others Lemmings to separate genders into my communities. Initally, I wanted to made just Sexual Assault Survivors, but on AskLemmy, some Lemmings wants a separation for women, men, and families & friends. So, I made it. The goal isn't to blame anyone, I'm just responding to the community request.

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  • [–] 17 points 1 day ago (7 children)

    Hey,

    I had a look at https://lemmy.world/post/54072534 (as this is where I guess you got your feedback).

    There seems to be a misunderstanding between the feedback and you segregating women and men in two separate communities.

    How about just having !sexualassaultsurvivors , as the single community for victims (whatever their genders), their friends and families?

    I read that as the suggestion people had for you in the comments (maybe I'm wrong), but it seemed like you understood it in a different way.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 day ago (1 child)

    Help groups in real life separate by gender simply because people feel more comfortable talking about it this way

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  • [–] 5 points 1 day ago

    That's fine. But we can agree that the name for the suggested com for male victims is fucking awful. I don't care what the sub is named on rEDdiT, I'm sure people will be able to find the com, even without such childish title.

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  • [–] [S] 3 points 1 day ago (4 children)

    Huh, it's possible. My english is... like that... I'm sorry for misunderstanding.

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  • [–] 8 points 1 day ago (3 children)

    No worries, good luck whatever you decide to do!

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  • [–] [S] 3 points 1 day ago (2 children)

    I'll just keep my communities. They're done. All is welcome on these spaces.

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  • [–] 5 points 23 hours ago (2 children)

    I think this is a very noble attempt and I commend you.

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  • [–] 5 points 23 hours ago (3 children)

    I'm a bit surprised by the fact some of the answers are skeptical or seek to censor a word used to describe reality.

    Yes, men get raped as well, and it is good there is a space to talk about it. Seeking to silence that is denial of reality and for some cases, homophobic. Straight men get raped. Lgbt+ men get raped. If you can't cope with that, it's a sign it was never your case and it's a good thing, but don't you fucking try to silence the victims.

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  • [–] 4 points 16 hours ago* (1 child)

    Over censorship is a growing problem in general. Words are being given too much power and weight.

    People seem to slowly be losing their ability to tell the difference between a word used to harm and that same word used to discuss.

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  • [–] 1 point 9 hours ago

    I think it's mostly a reflex of uneasiness, but considering how hard it can be for a victim of sexual violence to come forth and whatever the gender or sexual orientation, it is simply inconcevable to refuse to hear their words. And yes, it's icky, it's a fucking hard topic to write or read about.

    What I would advocate for is to (already done) display and pin informations toward helplines around the globe, and maybe soliciting the actual participation of these hotlines, if possible? Maybe some common education in how to receive and moderate communities with such difficult topics?

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  • [–] 1 point 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (5 children)

    What are these names, jfc. I'm all in support for what the community stands, but gee, I dunno maybe don't have the R word in the name? Maybe simplify it to Abuse Victim Support or something? 😔

    Edit;: corrected typo

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  • [–] 5 points 1 day ago (3 children)

    What's wrong with using the word "rape"?

    It's not a derogatory word.

    That's like a racist saying "we shouldn't talk about racism"

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  • [–] 6 points 18 hours ago (2 children)

    Trigger word, basically. While you are correct, I think an "abuse survivor/victim support" is far more understandable and approachable. That's just my opinion though

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  • [–] 2 points 16 hours ago* (1 child)

    Look I'm going to be blunt, while I understand trigger words are a very real thing.

    At some point I think trying to tip toe around words THAT hard starts to cause more harm then using the word in the first place.

    There is a time and a place, and proper care needs to be excerised yes. But like... If all you ever do is move the word to another word your not protecting anyone from the trigger word your just creating new trigger words.

    If you cant say rape in a medical, or psychological context and you pick something else instead you just create a mental link from the event to that new word. And now you have two trigger words instead of one.

    Words should not be allowed to have that kind of power.

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  • [–] 2 points 4 hours ago

    I don't have a problem saying it. But you meet people where they are. Sensitive topics soils be treated as such, specially with compassion. Although you have a point, we should not assume that most victims would be in said headspace, when they're recovering

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