The pumpkin was probably in chahoots with that cursed fig tree!

I heard they made up and, as a result, the Great Pumpkin was born.

something something The Onion

God works in mysterious ways.

halloween didn't exist when i was a kid. but easter did. so it's not the existing that makes it about jesus, but something else entirely

I was there when Halloween switched from scary to sexy. I started going to the WeHo Carnaval and the ladies of Southern California never disappointed. I showed up one year as Towelie and got to take pictures with all sorts of hot stoner chicks. Now I hand out candy and when high school girls show up I'm like yikes who let you out like that?!

I thought it was because Jesus fucked a pumpkin?

https://www.intomore.com/culture/the-trans-girls-and-pumpkins-memes-explained/

And, most importantly, he lost.

Hallowed be thy ween

Pumpkin Victory plap stream 12p UTC