Damn, that's me. I'm a big boy, but i move so silently that i scare the shit outta my wife on the regular when i appear next to her. i also cannot relax if i can't see all people and exits in the room. More than a one-on-one meeting sucks ass because the more people there are, the less i can keep a person under observation to make sure i'm safe from mood swings.

That's exhausting and so i just avoid it if possible. In public i am nothing without my noise cancelling headphones; worst experience i can have is a mess hall where everyone speaks because i just can't stop listening if someone's voice becomes threatening, so my mind tries to listen to a thousand conversations at once. I'd rather go hungry lol

My father never acknowledged what he did to me before he died; but i'm pretty sure he had similar issues and coped by drinking. I am very relaxed and a very social guy when drunk, so at least he serves as a warning for me to not rely on that crutch. he drank himself to death after everyone fled from his choleric drunkenness, i will not share the same fate.

Break the cycle.

Use your parents skills and your hyper vigilance to instead make something better.

It's time for you to have kids and start a new ninja clan 🥷