This is me now. Were currently going through this. Sadly we do have 2 kids. I just see us as toxic and have tried for a few years now to make it work and improve, but ultimately I can't take her actions. It's like living with someone with a gambling addiction but for shopping. I don't get her share of the mortgage money for months and it's only excuses and somehow my fault. Now that I want this and not backing down it's also my fault were going through this. All I keep saying is I still love you, but I can't be with you anymore. House foreclosure, bankruptcy, and you would think she gets it? Nope the final straw was her taking the kids without me to get a dog... a dog when we have no money! And also without my approval! Thankfully I was able to contact the place before pickup and let them know. They even said its mandatory all people in the family be there but she lied and said i had work. They were shocked. I knew right then she will never change and have to save my future.