Had a follow up appointment with the balls doctor and he says my testosterone is higher than he expected for not being on androgen suppression, but it's not high enough to reliably have a baby, so I have to come off my estradiol and progesterone as well for the next 3 months, then we'll do the vasectomy reversal, then I have to stay off until my wife is pregnant and the pregnancy is likely to succeed. At minimum, 7 months of what feminizing effects have stuck around reverting to male characteristics. At worst, I could be looking at a year, at which point, I'll probably say fuck this we're doing IVF.

I'm honestly numb. I still have my identity, I still look kind of femme, but it feels like I was on meds to hold back the man, and if I want to be a mother, I have to go back to living in hell for a while.

Please do not suggest adoption/donors/fostering. My wife and I have been talking a lot longer than any of you about how we want to become parents and we have ruled out those options. Unfortunately users on imgur couldn't follow this request.