what does the community actually expect from devs

I don't think the average self-hoster actually realises what's going on in the dev community. 'Vibe coding' is very different from AI-assisted workflows. All but the most die-hard devs are using AI in some way.

'No AI whatsoever' is unrealistic and if that’s your red line you're gonna see a smaller and smaller pool of things you can download and use.