it is reasonable and compassionate to treat an oppressed minority with grace, even - especially - when they criticize their oppressors. being "accusatory and hostile" is a normal, expected reaction to lifelong persecution. putting extra effort into engaging compassionately is moral even if you disagree with them.
it is reasonable to expect this from you.
when you frame this - extending grace to an oppressed, suicidal woman - as "sexist," you are flattening gender relations into an imaginary "all lives matter"-esque concept where all genders exist under the same conditions. this is literally an anti-feminist dog whistle of men's rights activists.
you should treat her better because society is biased against her and has instilled that bias into you. you are obligated to correct for it.
this means you do not fucking tone-police the oppressed.