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We can neither confirm nor deny the existence of your package (lemmus.org)
submitted 2 months ago by to c/microblogmemes@lemmy.world
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Source: https://mastodon.neilzone.co.uk/@neil/117201000187721159

transcriptNeil Brown @neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk

# Email from AliExpress:

Your parcel has moved two centimetres to the right. We will update you as soon as it moves.

# Another email from AliExpress:

It has moved! Your parcel has moved another two centimetres to the right.

# Email from UK parcel delivery company:

We have your parcel. It is probably somewhere in the UK, between arrival and departure. At some point, we will chuck it in your general direction. Your driver's name will be Ethan.

Sep 02, 2026, 10:35 AM

Neil Brown @neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk # Email from AliExpress: Your parcel has moved two centimetres to the right. We will update you as soon as it moves. # Another email from AliExpress: It has moved! Your parcel has moved another two centimetres to the right. # Email from UK parcel delivery company: We have your parcel. It is probably somewhere in the UK, between arrival and departure. At some point, we will chuck it in your general direction. Your driver’s name will be Ethan. Sep 02, 2026, 10:35 AM
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[–] 5 points 2 months ago (2 children)

it gets funnier when distribution centers are destroyed by drones and missiles and you get letters about your package status going from "the center is busted, the package is likely probably gone" to "lucky you, we found it! but it is a chunk of coal. But we found it!"

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