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autism@lemmy.world

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Is there a safe way to say you don't like something? (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 3 months ago by schipelblorp@sh.itjust.works to c/autism@lemmy.world

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I was talking with someone today and realized I did something I do quite often that might be a trait that gets me into trouble: I boldly state my preference for (or against) something.

In this case, it was being tired of classic rock from a lifetime of overexposure. I think I offended the person, but saved it by clarifying that I'm mostly tired that there is a play list of seemingly 100-songs that have been in continual rotation for 50 years.

Anyway, it occurs to me that I'm just stating my preferences and I personally thing that's fine and normal, but that people get personally offended if you don't like what they like; which makes no sense to me. It's like if you don't like bland food, I'm not going to get offended because I can't handle anything hotter than black pepper. It doesn't ultimately mean anything significant.

Thoughts, ideas, suggestions?

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[–] fushuan@piefed.blahaj.zone 6 points 3 months ago

Why is not liking something any more of a conversation stopper than liking something?

Ever heard of "Yes, and" in the improv scene? Giving a negative without then giving an out to the other person to keep talking puts the responsibility of finding a different topic on them. Do that several times, and people get tired of finding new topics.

Often when people ask you if you like X music, you can say that no, but I like these other music styles. That opens the conversation so they can find songs in your style they like and keep the conversation flowing. If they then trash you that's not on you tho.

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