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Please stop (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 4 months ago by to c/curatedtumblr@sh.itjust.works
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Editor's note: this is a post about American Independence Day celebrations

existentialmemes

Alright, I'm going to launch explosives around your house. For several hours. Yes it is dangerous and terrible for wildlife and the environment. And yes your pets will get sick from eating the debris and you will feel terrorized inside your own home.

No you can't opt out of it. Everyone is doing it and frankly it's weird that you don't want to.

No you can't be the one launching the explosives you need a license for that. You can however launch these marginally smaller ones though. Yeah just whenever you want. 2am sounds great.

So anyway, fireworks were a mistake and it's never too early to start reminding you of that.

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[–] 16 points 4 months ago (3 children)

Heh, I live in a racially mixed neighborhood where the Mexicans help the rest of the us find the "good stuff". I have been in an actual war zone but my neighborhood is at WW1 level amounts of black powder and badly made improvised explosives with copper, magnesium, and titanium sprinkled in for seasoning. Last year there were teenagers with eight inch mortars which I cannot convey how insanely illegal those are.

Kind of amazing we haven't set the neighborhood or even a single house on fire now that I think about it.

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  • [–] 1 point 4 months ago (1 child)

    PSA do not mess with additives other than Titanium for salutes. Ideally do not mess with improvised explosives at all but if you really are hell-bent on upping the noise, a string-bound blackpowder maroon is the way to go. Hello interpol my old friend.

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