Bit of a shower thought: Outside of limited circumstances, like interviews or therapy, nobody is really expected to give you honest feedback on how you come across.

This sucks. I've been told I come across as unfriendly once, but I have no idea if I was just nervous and tired at the time. I still cherish that one moment almost 10 years ago when someone told me I was funny in some corporate team building bs.

Now, I could ask friends and family, but I believe they would probably not tell me the full, honest truth. After all, they (hopefully) like me and I would probably avoid being too harsh to everyone but very close people in private.

At the same time, I know plenty of people who really should get some feedback, who probably believe they are funny while everyone is bored and annoyed and hopes they talk a little less and the like.

So, are there socially accepted ways to get feedback on how you come across?

I realize that people are strange, relationships are hard, P!=NP and anime is not real. Still, it would be nice to have.

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[–] 11 points 4 months ago (3 children)

I don't know if it's a coincidence but when I met Finnish people, they always made comments about how you come across. One I remember is "you're not very likeable but at least you're not creepy". So.. Go to Finland?

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  • [–] 1 point 4 months ago (1 child)

    The Netherlands are known to have the bluntest people in the world to the point of articles wondering about Dutch rudeness proliferating across the Internet. I had no idea that Finland was similar.

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