Just adding my two cents in here to say that allies can come in all shapes and sizes, and we need all the allies we can get. Im also not above calling out men for their terrible behavior.

The patriarchy exists for everybody and affects every single person, no matter your gender race sexual orientation etc etc. For men this normally takes the toxic masculinity form, where feelings are discouraged, and caring for yourself is for soft men. If you welcome a cis man into a space where its ok to feel what you feel, therapy for example, theres a better chance that that man will develop empathy for others because someone else had empathy for him.

For the time i was pretending, a common theme amongst men is isolation, echo chambers, and labeling fear. Much the same as it is now. They gravitate towards people who think like them, because for men approaching a group of people or just a single person is threatening. And its a position earned by other people in their gender.

Yes men have started 99.99% of wars. Yes men are directly or indirectly responsible for almost everything bad in our world. But kevin and thomas down the street didnt make those things happen.

Dividing is whats destroying us. Being open and inclusive is the name of the game in my mind. People are just people and they make mistakes. If theyre open to learning or being better to others and the world then im willing to let them learn.

Dont further the culture war for them. Be open to humanity as a whole, not just your favorite parts. And punch nazis!