The part about it being at least partly a limitation of the language I do get, I've been saying for years and years how the dumbing down of spoken language is screwing up society, because thoughts are words, and if you don't have the words you don't have the thoughts. I just didn't appreciate it was so bad in Finnish language.
It would make all the sense in the world if you think you're depressed, but keep in mind that sometimes depression is situational - you might just be surrounded by assholes. I hope it gets easier. I'll remember you in case we cross paths again on here.