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[–] 135 points 9 months ago (13 children)

He is just afraid people might show him what they really think of him.

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  • [–] 52 points 9 months ago (10 children)

    Yeah, like getting assassinated in a huge crowd of people in an arena with lots of good angles.

    Sad he won’t go.

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  • [–] 27 points 9 months ago (3 children)

    Maybe there's a show at Ford's Theater he can attend instead?

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  • [–] 7 points 9 months ago (4 children)

    He's not going because he's terrified of California, specifically the Bay Area. He probably believes all that bullshit they spew on Fox News about not being able to walk three steps without landing in human feces (that's just my apartment).

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  • [–] 4 points 9 months ago (3 children)

    We should crown fund you a roomba for the poop floor

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  • [–] 2 points 9 months ago* (2 children)

    i already have a roomba. it's full. i just poop A LOT

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