I don't think it is about needing a doctorate beforehand and I find your characterization of @it_depends_man@lemmy.world's advice on social etiquette weirdly non-sequitur and white knighty. Would you walk into a religious place of worship, a strip club, a gun range, or Costco without at least knowing how to interact with that space? Wearing your magic underwear? Bring enough fives? Ear protection? Membership card?

The point being virtual spaces are weird and full of weird people that live in their head. And they make communities that have implicit and explicit rules like all communities. And if you're wading neck deep into a pool of internet weirdos (their pool, mind you, you're the outsider traipsing in wanting their knowledge and wisdom) and want your question answered, the lurk and learn advice from above is solid.

Does it suck? Maybe? I can see it from the community's perspective where they set the barrier to entry.