I guess what I want is an actual virtual private browser. Where thousands of people send their requests to a virtual browser encrypted, it makes the request from that browser then sends the data back encrypted on your end. End goal being to not only cloak the IP, but also cloak the browser uniqueness trackers. Essentially it would end up with sites getting thousands of requests like normal, but they would all look like they were coming from the same browser/user. Thus, they still get their view counts and have some non-targeted advertising if they must, but we can keep our privacy.