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Is Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets better than The Fifth Element? Movie Review (blenderdumbass.org)
submitted 1 year ago by to c/movies@piefed.social
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It is funny that I was just watching Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets while drinking Valerian. I was pissed at Luc Besson because I just watched and reviewed The Fifth Element. That review was more of a ramble about my theory surrounding his personal life. Which ties in neatly into the message of the film "Love". But for some reason I completely forgot to talk about its qualities. Which I suppose this review will fix. I will compare the two grand space-operas from Luc Besson. And hopefully we will learn something in the process.

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[–] 7 points 1 year ago (4 children)

I stopped watching Valerian because I was so unbelievably bored.

Also, you're really gonna pay yourself on the back and say you're "review and critique" of The Fifth Element was good and well-rounded?

Fuck off.

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  • [–] [S] 2 points 1 year ago (3 children)

    I watch way too many movies to think about what I write too deeply. My ritual is: watch a movie, and as quickly as I can dump my feelings about it into a review. My reviews tend to be a little emotional and rambly because of it.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 year ago (2 children)

    Damn, that's a terrible system.

    You should stop "reviewing" and get some friends whom you enjoy talking about movies with.

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  • [–] [S] 1 point 1 year ago (1 child)

    I do both. There is like 1 and a half people that read my rambly reviews regularly. That one guy I know of really starts to like my latest few reviews where I come up with wild theories for why the films are the way they are. Like I go and speculate some stuff based on the director's personal life or the writer's other work. Or like I had a whole Michael Bay marathon and then a Jerry Bruckheimer marathon. And now I suppose I'm having a Luc Besson marathon. And Luc had enough bad shit crazy stuff in his life, which is gold for wild conspiracy theories. So I keep pumping those.

    I enjoy writing them. There is at least one guy that enjoys reading them. So I guess I gonna keep doing it for a while.

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