Only read the first few paragraphs because it told me what I wanted to know & already knew. But IMHO the downvotes here are unwarranted unless it's from the incels & assholes who don't like being told the truth that actual caring is more important than just saying you care.
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I read the article. The title is sucky clickbait. Tl;dr: women evaluate men based off of kind acts that reflect anticipation of needs. Narcissists do well on dating apps where they "perform" for the contacts from the "sales funnel" of dating contacts. Guys who do bankroll activities or carefully crafted morning texts are not deemed as good of a long term prospect as the kind act ones.
I want to brainstorm a theory of mine:
Developing humans have levels of empathy (social behavior) that develop based on instinct mixed with deliberate cognition:
- iron rule - you kiss ass to those with more power and act selfishly to those with less power
- golden rule - you do to others based on how you imagine you would want
- platinum rule - you do to others based on how you imagine they would want
Prior = prerequisite
Being able to articulate what you want is a prior. Being able to comprehend that someone else has wants in a relatively resource scarce environment is the second prior. The golden rule has a prior of being able to imagine yourself in a different situation. The platinum rule has a prior of being able to imagine a different person in their situation.
I guess that humans develop capacity to abide each "rule" by playing with cognitive abilities while executing the "lower" rule. Each person can have different "rules" they abide for different people and situations.
I think that women who search for a "kind acts" guy may be searching for a minimum level of intelligence on top of long term support in a family environment.
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