To be fair, this is exactly what I imagine an E-Mail from Musk would look like.

Do it, the fediverse needs a tesla

If you don’t, you may find yourself under a rest

Be careful when accepting payoffs from a certified nazi. He does not have your best interests at heart. "Heart" as in..."He threw his heart out to the crowd!".

FYI: These are called Self control groups/self selection

By answering these emails, you are self-selecting as someone who is more likely to go through everything these people want

Making the email have mass appeal would increase the load on the workforce, which would increase operating cost

Thats also the reason why triage for things like er rooms is a thing.