Advice for all ages: commit one crime at a time. Your insurance lapsed from non-payment? Don't run a red light! Have a dead body in trunk? Know the speed limit and stay with in it!

My dad's favorite, "If you're going to do something stupid, don't do something stupid."

"Don't die, and if anyone gets hurt the explanation better be really funny,"

black parents: watch out for cops

Whenever I run into a store and leave one of the kids in the car for a few minutes, I always tell them "don't get tooked" while closing the door.

So far, so good.

By the time I was ending highschool my mother's standard good bye when I went out for the night was "don't do anything illegal with my car."