Hi.

I'm M18. I've been rotting in my room for an entire year after high school ended. My parents want me to go to college but I can't make myself focus on studying no matter how much effort I put into it.

I don't know what degree I want, and I don't know if I even want to do anything at all. I've been battling with depression since 12 and I just can't see a path forward. My mind keeps making excuses for why I shouldn't do things, even though I know for sure that I should be pulling my shit together ASAP. My parents can't afford to have me being a dead weight forever, and I know I'm wasting my time, BUT I JUST CAN'T MAKE MYSELF DO ANYTHING

I'm autistic and have a bunch of sensibilities. I've tried finding jobs around me (rural Brazil) but most of them are manual work and I'm not entirely suited for that stuff (sorry if it sounds like I'm making excuses). I'm still looking but so far I've had no luck.

I'm studying the possibility of moving out to live with my dad somewhere else, but so far that's not happening.

TL;DR: common post-high-school panic

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[–] 4 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 child)

I can't say I know anything about your situation aside from what you stipulated. What interests you (anything, not necessarily career stuff)? I'm just going to list a lot of things so you can just try to narrow down what you want from that.

Have you taken a trip to a bigger city like your regional capital or like Rio or Sao Paulo (Brazil is big so no idea how much of a trip that would be)? Sometimes being in a small town limits what options you think you have.

Check if there's a college or university fair style event where you can tour some programs to see what career path interests you. You don't necessarily have to find "the one true match", just take it seriously and jot down notes of what you saw so you can think about what stood out. It's pretty normal to not know what you will or won't be good at for a career because you haven't had a taste for the experience. Career fairs might also be a help, if there's a job you didn't know existed you can ask what education is needed to get there.

There are also plenty of jobs you don't need to be booksmart or be that strong to do. Like get a forklift or commercial vehicle license and become an operator of those for example.

The financial thing might mean you want to "get it together ASAP" but that's just the situation put on you, it says nothing to me about whether you are capable or not. You still have time to figure things out. Me saying "Just don't be depressed" is not useful, but I will leave it at this: I get it, it's easy to get in a doom loop, but don't judge your career prospects from what you know at this moment. Of course you know nothing, same as everybody, you're just out of high school. Think about where you think you'd enjoy being, after you figure out the things you need to figure out, whether by studying, certification training or working on creative and interpersonal skills, and make your decision based on that. One thing that worried me at your age, is that I'd have to 'lock something in' and be stuck with it the rest of my life, but I found that to be far from my and others' reality.

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  • [–] [S] 3 points 3 days ago*

    I really appreciate the write-up.

    What interests you (anything, not necessarily career stuff)?

    I don't have many stand-out interests, but I'm very proficient with computers and can speak English rather well. I've thought about comp-sci but it's currently at an all-time-high supply and the area itself doesn't appeal much to me.

    There are also plenty of jobs you don't need to be booksmart or be that strong to do. Like get a forklift or commercial vehicle license and become an operator of those for example.

    Yeah, that's an interesting path too.

    Think about where you think you'd enjoy being, after you figure out the things you need to figure out, whether by studying, certification training or working on creative and interpersonal skills, and make your decision based on that. One thing that worried me at your age, is that I'd have to 'lock something in' and be stuck with it the rest of my life, but I found that to be far from my and others' reality.

    I understand. Thank you for this

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