Sigh. I don't know where to start or what do I need to ask here even at all.

So, I have joined a new workplace and I just don't know how to interact with people. Most of the time I don't feel the energy to interact. But being shutdown feels not very socially acceptable behavior nor I feel it would do any good to me.

First two weeks, I didn't talk with anyone at all. Only one or two interactions here and there that's about it. After I did manage to get into small group of employees who've joined recently and they allowed me to join their social circle.

At this point, I thought I was gonna be okay and will improve at socialising. But even after a month, I still feel this feeling of being subhuman level at socialising. I feel so different, I feel so not normal. I feel everyone are just better at socialising. They got this nailed down somewhere down their lives but somehow I just missed it.

I just don't know what to do. I don't have confidence in my voice either so most of the time I try to end conversations with few words. Idk anything really.

Edit: Wow, I didn't expect this much reception to this post especially since it was very messy how I explained my problem. But you guys surprised me, haha. Thank you all for your advice. I'm reading every one of your replies! I love this community.

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[–] 1 point 5 days ago

A few things that I haven't read here:

  1. Everyone at work is stressed. Everyone wants to be somewhere else, but has to pay bills. Therefore, don't take it personal if people are angry, frustrated, snap at you or don't want to talk. Many of the people that come across as mean and unfriendly are nice and chill off the clock.

  2. Likewise, accept if people keep their distance. Consider how much distance you want to keep, and how much you trust which coworker. Again, nothing personal, just the way people are. As someone said so nicely, often, politeness is more important than friendliness.

  3. Shared suffering is bonding. "Sucks today, eh?" is a complete sentence and shows that you are on their team. Be careful around talking about specific people or talking politics. And if you do, start slowly. Feel out the other person first, and always consider how big the chance of them being a backstabbing bootlicker is, and how much damage they could do to you in that case. Don't be paranoid either, but don't blindly trust strangers.

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