i'm autistic, not ADHD. But yeah I feel.this exactly.

I had a realization about this in the last band I was in. All of my friends and my musical network had fallen apart as we grew up do I turned to Craigslist for months. I found a band and joined. The singer who also wrote most of the music moved away, so we changed names and I took over both of those duties too.

Before, I had formed my taste with my friends, and we formed bands together. This was different- we all had our own tastes relatively established, and I was trying to find the overlap that we all liked. We also wanted to play live, so for the first time in my life I was also writing to try to please audiences rather than just do what I wanted.

What worked? Being bland as fuck. All of the little weird quirks that I found interesting were rough edges that needed to be smoothed off for accessibility. It is the difference between art and a product.

Most TV shows and movies are huge productions that cost millions of dollars to produce. There are some people involved who are trying to be artists, who actually have vision and creativity they are trying tk share with the world. But there are also executives trying to monetize it, trying to get a return on that investment. With TV shows in particular they often keep characters around and keep trying tk make new seasons not for the sake of art but for the sake of employment.

I find smaller productions more interesting. YouTube used to be good, and maybe still has some good content but the platform is terrible.