What you don’t want to pay a surcharge every month for the privilege to fund a micro government focused on harassing its constituents?

Ya fuck HOAs

Some HOA's are literally just to pay for the maintenance of a shared private drive, which IMO is reasonable. So, we explicitly refused to make any offers or consider any homes in HOA's which didn't let us see their charter. Interestingly enough, that was all of them... makes you think.

This is my number one requirement.

Depends on the HOA. Some are basically microdictatorships, some are just actually a group of homeowners trying to make sure their neighborhood doesn't fall apart. Several of the houses down the road that don't have HOAs have broken furniture and smashed cars in their front yards. Imagine trying to sell your home living next to that.

We pay about $500 a year to our HOA, and that gives us access to a neighborhood playground/yearly events/etc. Only time we had to reach out was to build a fence and it was just verifying we were in the guidelines for type of fence allowed and not encroaching neighbors.