Why not force her to sit in her own shit 10 hours a day while I’m at my job.

She has the same ability to get up out of her shit and improve her situation that her kids did at 18, depending on upbringing.

A lot of these sorts of discussions seem to center around an implicit social contract that people don't realize they're agreeing to on a minute by minute basis. It sort of works like a pension where the company goes bankrupt. Now everyone who was depending on it starts from scratch and all the investment (time, karma) is gone.

https://issendai.com/psychology/estrangement/missing-missing-reasons/