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[–] 49 points 3 months ago (17 children)

Dating as a guy in your early 20s is a fucking minefield. Now that I'm 30 it's better because nobody lies about being in their upper 20s or 30s, anyone who would be illegal is easy to spot because people under about 22 look like actual children to me now, and if absolutely needed it's easy enough to just take any new dating prospect to a bar and let the bartender card them.

But back in my early 20s none of that was true. Half the women on dating apps were lying about their age. Judging age visually between about 16 and 20 can get really fuzzy. Also people who were 20 were still in my age range so taking them to a bar to get carded doesn't work. Completely turned me off dating for a while.

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  • [–] 22 points 3 months ago* (9 children)

    if absolutely needed it’s easy enough to just take any new dating prospect to a bar and let the bartender card them.

    FYI this is not allowed to be used as a defense in court in some states (e.g. mine). If you card them and they have a fake ID, you're still criminally culpable for anything untoward.

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  • [–] 22 points 3 months ago (8 children)

    They break the law, they lie, and you get in trouble still?

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  • [–] 27 points 3 months ago (1 child)

    Seriously, what's the option - oh you look slightly young, let me see your birth certificate? Wait that might be a forgery, show me your driver's license? Wait, that might be a forgery - show me an x-ray of your bones so I can analyze your growth plates.

    Fucking hell

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  • [–] 14 points 3 months ago (3 children)

    Yeah that doesn't sound right, even ethically.

    If by your sincere knowledge you're having a date with an adult, you shouldn't get in trouble for anything

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  • [–] -1 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    F.S.S. 794.021:

    Ignorance or belief as to victim's age no defense

    When, in this chapter, the criminality of conduct depends upon the victim's being below a certain specified age, ignorance of the age is no defense. Neither shall misrepresentation of age by such person nor a bona fide belief that such person is over the [...]

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  • [–] 9 points 3 months ago (1 child)

    Sure

    That is still not right though. If someone looks and acts 18+ and has a fake ID saying they're 18+ and they turn out yo be 16, well, there comes a point where you really handled in good faith. When good faith becomes punishable, were in bad territory

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  • [–] 0 points 3 months ago*

    It's not that blatant:

    F.S.S. 794.021:

    #Ignorance or belief as to victim's age no defense

    "When, in this chapter, the criminality of conduct depends upon the victim's being below a certain specified age, ignorance of the age is no defense. Neither shall misrepresentation of age by such person nor a bona fide belief that such person is over the [...]"

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  • [–] 6 points 3 months ago (6 children)

    Best thing, though unfortunately not quite possible, would be to check each other's ID.

    1. You can be certain about each other's age.
    2. Should they harm you, you now know who the other person is, and they get the same reassurance.

    But that conversation wouldn't work.

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  • [–] 11 points 3 months ago

    You can be certain about each other’s age.

    ...unless they have a fake ID. Which in turn is not in any way a defense should you perform certain acts with them that are illegal due to age. You're just supposed to be able to sense the difference between someone slightly above and slightly below the line in your jurisdiction.

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