I have done many, many things I regret, but the one I really dread being held in judgement against me in the Court of the Holy is the thing with the giant African ground snails. It seemed a great idea at the time, but what a terrible thing to do to someone. I was such an arsehole back then. Actually there's quite a long list of stuff. Maybe I should become Catholic, then I just say sorry and it's all good, right?