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Men's therapy in a nutshell (i.redd.it)
submitted 7 months ago by to c/memes@lemmy.world
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[–] 5 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (4 children)

No.

Because an actual therapist would teach you skills in the way of being able to learn and recognize your triggers, help coach you into calmly but firmly asserting your boundaries, to thus lessen the chance of you being triggered, and would also teach you skills for recognizing and managing when you flip over into that pure fight or flight, rage and terror mode.

If there isn't anything like that, you're not experiencieng therapy.

You're just paying too much money to vent at someone.

Also just fyi I guess at this point, the original usage of 'triggered' and 'triggering' was specifically in reference to people being flipped back into that state of essentially aggrevated panic, as a result of being reminded, either consciously or subconsciously, or previously experienced extreme trauma.

Thats... actually what the term means, not ... what the internet / social media has turned it into, basically just meaning 'angry/embarassed'.

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago* (2 children)

    You’re just paying too much money to vent at someone.

    This is what a lot of folks in therapy want. They don't want change, they just want someone to vent to and validate themselves.

    I also notice... those are the same people who go around demanding and claiming everyone also needs therapy and that if you aren't actively in therapy you are in denial about your issues or something.

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  • [–] 2 points 7 months ago (1 child)

    I've always been of the mindset that some people actually use therapy to learn, heal, and grow as compassionate human beings. While others just use it for validation and ego stroking.

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  • [–] 3 points 7 months ago

    I think of it like physical therapy. If you do the work you eventually won't need the therapist, that is the goal.

    But a lot of people just refuse to do the work. But at least with a PT they won't waste your time on years of PT if you aren't trying to make progress.

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  • [–] 1 point 7 months ago

    I mean... so, yes?

    Those skills being taught are there to help you come to a state of acceptance, an emotional place of 'It is what it is. It happened, but I don't feel thrown into an emotional spiral by remembering it.' Shitty 'be a man' therapists or 'counselors' might try to get you to just repress the feelings to pretend to have reached that space for the sake of fitting in. Grifty ones might have you come in and talk endlessly about it so they can charge you for all the time while you effectively talk yourself through it enough to suck some of the power out of the memory. It all seems to land somewhere on a spectrum within the space of 'it is what it is,' whether it's a healthy version or not.

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