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My 6 year old son is misgendering me (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 7 months ago by to c/parenting@lemmy.world
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Brief summary of context. I socially transitioned before he was conceived. His birth mother left me before he was born. I spent 18 months fighting to even meet him. Eventually had things going smoothly with overnight time. Then the birth mother cut contact again. I've only just got to see him in a supervised context.

Near the end of the last session I referred to myself as mummy Eve, as I've done thousands of times in the past without issue. This time he yells that he hates it when I say that. He goes on to say I'm just pretending, I'm not a mummy I'm a he, and he knows I'm a he because I'm wearing a top.

I'm certain he's getting this from his birth mum. I'm devastated, it pushed me closer to giving up than I have been for a while. I don't know if there's anything I can do about it in the two hours a week I have with him. (At least for now)

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[–] 6 points 7 months ago (1 child)

I understand this sucks. A lot. And you are probably right that the birth mother is influencing your child. But you can’t let it get to you and you can’t let you anger towards it (and the birth mother) show.

Unfortunately, it seems your child is stuck between his two parents. He will most likely lash out, now and in the future. And it will hurt.

I don’t have a lot of advice, just some support to give. Don’t let it get to you. Your kid loves you and you love him. Acceptance (yours towards whatever he say and will say) is fundamental even in the face of anger and rejection. You are also right that with only two hours a week there is little to do. I wish you all the best.

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