Ok:

• Added zero actual value to humanity: debatable for both. Both of them make information, right or wrong, more easily accessible to people, whether that's a net value to society is debatable. The me too movement would've been impossible without the Internet, but so would the MAGA movement.
• Can do any task about 70% correctly about 70% of the time: I'll give you that one
• Drove up electricity demands through the roof: check, happened slower then AI, but especially in the early days it was increasing demand, and the Internet in general is a cause for far more demand then AI
• Gave humanity the option to make childporn from their armchair: can't make child porn, but made it exponentially more accessible and prevalent.
• Is generating such hardware shortages that computer hardware prices have doubled, tripled, quadrupled, and more to come!: I'll give you that one
• Increased misinformation by factors of thousands, if not more: check
• Broke CAPTCHAs for good, thanks for that: didn't break captchas but increased spam and made it harder to detect bots which made it necessary to make captcha
• Caused wild random growth of super datacenters that pollute like crazy and take away all the groundwater everywhere: check, most data centers these days are still running traditional servers that hold up the Internet.
• Steals all data from everyone everywhere with impunity: check
• Highly confident in giving the wrong answer: check, it just used to be that a human would give you that wrong answer confidently. People didn't need AI to write thousands of articles and posts about vaccines causing autism.
• Literally made ma y people lose their mind into AI psychosis: check, it's made large chunks of society delusional, and many people have lost there minds on it
• Do I still need to continue?

9/11, so most. LLMs are the Internet distilled, and thus they have the same problems, and benefits of it.