then why is doing it to the us "whataboutism"?

I don't know how to be any more clear this. Using whataboutism is using whataboutism. If I talk about China and you say "but what about US!", that's a whataboutism, because we're not talking about the US. And vise versa. It's a clear attempt to excuse and deflect blame away from the topic at hand and onto someone else.

it is very deflective to go both sides bad

I'm glad you finally understand.