Hi, transmasc teen here. I have had a past with the social worker at my high school refusing to use the correct name and pronouns because I have to come out to my family if I do so. I don't wanna have to come out to my family, because even the most supportive members are anti-Testosterone. I am pro-Testosterone. They also say I will always have boobs and a vagina even if I get the surgeries because that's how I was born, and that I'm just a confused girl, when I know in my heart I am Anthony the sure and secure guy.

I haven't had a session with her in a while, so I don't know if she will use Anthony and he/him in private, but she won't let other teachers know that's what I would like to be called and calls me my birth name and uses she/her pronouns, but "feels bad". IDK if this is some law or what. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and say maybe she just can't lose her job.

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[–] 23 points 10 months ago* (2 children)

I suppose you could ask if she refuses to use your preferred name/pronouns (assuming she does) because of personal views or legal/policy reasons.

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  • [–] 7 points 10 months ago

    There are definitely jurisdictions where teachers/counsellors are obligated to get permission from parents to use names that don't match the sex listed elsewhere.

    I wonder if the counsellor would object to using a nickname that's not similar to your name but is still a girls name. I only ask because Toni Braxton is a woman, maybe you could tell your counsellor you're really inspired by her and would she please call you "Toni"?

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  • [–] 5 points 10 months ago

    Very much this, there was some hubbub a while back where policies got passed the prevented people in education from effectively hiding things from parents such as if a child was trans and hadn't told their parents. It put them in the situation of being an asshole or risking their jobs and careers. They too might be a victim in an oppressive system.

    You may also be able to find a handbook posted somewhere that outlines their policies and procedures. If you can find that, you may find your answers without even asking.

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