A lot of places don't actually do real references. They will say that you worked there and give no opinions on you as a worker, because they don't want to risk getting sued for you not getting the job. Not sure if that helps you worry less. As far as the cultiness, I wouldn't mention it. I'd come up with a more BS excuse that flatters the potential employer without insulting the previous one. Unfortunately, I've been a SAHM for too long and can't think of any examples for you...