I mean yeah assessing people on an individual level is different from collective. Look at the collective history of white people over the past few centuries and it's pretty logical why PoC are going to have their guard up. When white folk came to your country as a group, historical precendent is such that killing and/or stealing are high on the list of potential outcomes.

The Democratic party supported the civil rights act of 1964 in the US, which ended race based segregation. Since then not a single democratic presidential nominee has won the majority of the white vote. That's some pretty dark shit.

This doesn't mean that any single individual white person is presumed bad.

That’s the spirit!

While I believe what you express above comes from a good place of empathy, care, and respect, if you’re open to suggestions, I would offer the following.

This hat-in-hand attitude often comes across as a tedious neoliberal brand of white guilt and “I acknowledge my privilege” performative social justice that primarily seeks personal absolution from allies rather than a hand in fighting systemic injustice.

Instead, it is a more useful exercise to consider your privileged identities, such as apparent gender or the color of your skin, as a disavowable inheritance like a family name, rendering them mere tools you bring to the cause of liberation, rather than a scarlet WM you must apologize to your comrades for at every turn.

Edit: concretely, I mean that it is no better to “other” yourself than someone else. Instead, acknowledge that our perceptions of race and gender are manufactured (and historically none more-so than whiteness and masculinity, easy proxies for explicit political and socioeconomic power). Whiteness and masculinity telegraph it the way a gun telegraphs strength. So instead of apologizing for how the weapons you were born with have been used by oppressors in the past, reject and subvert what they represent by committing them to the cause of those who are oppressed today.