I was always told that I’d be more charitable about this kind of thing once I had kids.

No idea where anyone got that idea. After becoming a parent I’m WAY more judgy about bad parenting.

As one of those neurodivergent kids, my mom explicitly laid all the blame on me whenever she felt embarrassed in public. I was removed from activities countless times without any clear understanding of why - all I knew was I wasn't allowed to do fun things. There was no accommodation for sensory issues, no space provided for me to self-regulate, no understanding that I was having a difficult time and needed support - just labels thrown at me for "being difficult", as if by merely existing, I was a problem.

Every child deserves to participate in enriching activities regardless of their neurotype. By removing neurodiverse kids (and not returning after they calm down) or outright keeping them away from such events, they may internalize the idea that who they are is not acceptable. Parents, there are resources available today that didn't exist in the 90s. There is no reason to raise your neurodiverse kid the way we used to be raised. If you don't know what to do with your kid and you haven't already done so, get help. Please.

My kid finally gets excited about going to the cinema, so we go,and he ends up having difficulty regulating himself there......I guess I better scoop him up and fuck off back to the cave we crawled out of.

If they are doing something really disruptive like crying for extended periods of time just remove them from the setting for long enough to regulate themselves and go back in. Keeping them in a setting where they can't regulate themselves for extended periods of time is counterproductive. I stepped out into the hall with my klddo to get away from the loud noise and bright screen so she could get herself under control a lot of times, and eventually she figured out how to regulate herself in those same situations.

Now if people are shitty because the kiddo is doing regular kid things or because they were disruptive for a short period of time then they can go eat a turd.

if a child is dedicated to their course of action, then you can’t win. You can never win a battle of wills against a young child.

smh

I don't even know who does it worse.

People who have absolutely zero experience with children judging

Or the other parents who had a child that gave them no issues from birth. 'Just politely ask them' and they will be good. It 'worked for me'.