Well I was half joking, but it seems to me like you are promoting a pretty big double standard here. You start off by saying "We can start with motherfucking saturday morning cartoons where they clearly showed who the bad guys are and what it means to be a bad guy." So you are clearly criticizing something you find fault with (aka problematic) about modern cartoons (I'm not sure what, I don't really watch cartoons anymore) but turn around and say I shouldn't criticize "Problematic" things in "iconic" programs. Then you turn around once more and criticize them your own self in that they were glorified toy commercials, which is a good point. Things can be problematic in more than one way.
I agree that we should teach kids right from wrong (who are the good guys and who are the bad guys), but if you then portray the U.S. Military as 'The good guys' I have a problem with that. I bet a lot of kids who grew up idolizing the Joes ended up joining the military themselves, only to be forced to help overthrow democratically elected leaders in Central and South America, or protecting the U.S.'s ability to buy oil or opium products for cheap by murdering brown folks in the middle east. In my view, the U.S. Military haven't unambiguously been "the good guys" since 1945, and even then the way that war ended was problematic as hell, and I'm not joking about that.
It's irrelevant that Scrooge is a Duck, the message that some billionaires aren't the scum of the Earth is a dangerous message to put out to impressionable young minds- no matter how cutesy you make it look. Look at how many of us who grew up in that era now idolize Elon Musk or Bill Gates.
Yes, I understand that people have cherished memories of some of these shows (just like young people today will someday look back fondly on the shows you feel comfortable criticizing), but being able to look back at the past with the nostalgia Goggles off, and be honest about the things that shaped our values is a part of maturing and growing as people. If the only defense you have of such programs is that they are 'cherished memories'- that seems weak af tbh.
And btw, you friend is absolutely right. Zootopia is 100% copaganda. Just like 1000 other TV programs and movies in our culture. The fact that portraying cops as unambiguous 'good guys' is far and away the norm, but even the mildest of critiques such as Zootopia being copoganda sticks out as silly to you is the reason why it's important to call stuff like this out when we see it.
I’m really tired of losing because we can’t figure out what people actually need to hear to make the world better.
People need to hear and wake up to reality. Coddling reactionary fragile egos isn't going to accomplish that. Unflinchingly evaluating where we are and how we got here is the only way to do that- even if it makes people slightly uncomfortable for a moment.