servers.joinmatrix.org has a good list of public servers, and it links to their privacy policies and codes of conduct

One thing to be aware of if you want to avoid matrix.org is that Matrix communities can restrict federation with other servers.

In fact, the official Codeberg Matrix space has adopted this setting, and I ended up having to create an account on matrix.org again.

`createRoom` which has federation off? · Issue #3164 · matrix-org/matrix-js-sdk

To add in here, what's the ups and downs or joining a server vs hosting your own?