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What's wrong with getting married for money? (lemmy.ml)
submitted 1 year ago by to c/explainlikeimfive@lemmy.world
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What's wrong with getting married for money? As long as your upfront about it and the other person is ok with it then what's the problem?

I really want to get married. It's my plan to marry someone who is rich and become a stay at home wife. I don't have much going for me and it's the only way I can think of to get rich and not work at Burger King forever.

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[–] 15 points 1 year ago (4 children)

What’s wrong with getting married for money? As long as your upfront about it and the other person is ok with it then what’s the problem?

If both people are onboard, its okay I guess. However, I imagine someone that is rich and okay taking on a partner with no love in relationship is going to have a lot of choices of people to pick from for the position of "stay at home partner". I'm guessing that you'd have to bring a lot to the table to win out over your competition. If I were not the rich one, I'd also be worried about the end-game. A soon as whatever got me the rich partner fades, what would prevent my rich partner from dumping me and trading up to someone that has what I had years prior? You can bet anyone rich will make you sign a prenup, so you won't be walking away with very much when it ends.

The deep loving relationship is what keeps partners together long after looks, charisma, and cognition fade with the passing years and advanced aging. Getting old sucks for everyone and there's nothing we can do to escape it. Getting old alone without my loving partner sounds like hell.

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  • [–] [S] -5 points 1 year ago (3 children)

    "If both people are onboard, its okay I guess. However, I imagine someone that is rich and okay taking on a partner with no love in relationship is going to have a lot of choices of people to pick from for the position of “stay at home partner”.

    Who says there won't be love? We can still love each other. He would love me and give me what he has to give and I will love him and give him and give him what I have to give. I'm sure there's lots of competition. I never said there wasn't. I just need to be the best somehow.

    "I'm guessing that you’d have to bring a lot to the table to win out over your competition."

    Well, that's subjective. It would be up to person to decide if I'm the one.

    "If I were not the rich one, I’d also be worried about the end-game."

    I don't just want money. A nice ass and cute face would also be nice.

    "A soon as whatever got me the rich partner fades, what would prevent my rich partner from dumping me and trading up to someone that has what I had years prior?"

    This could happen in any relationship. The only difference is that you wouldn't have benefited as much as you would have with the rich man.

    "The deep loving relationship is what keeps partners together long after looks, charisma, and cognition fade with the passing years and advanced aging."

    Incredibly vague concepts. Things like "charisma" and "looks" are nice but I also care about the material and literal in a relationship.

    "Getting old sucks for everyone and there’s nothing we can do to escape it. Getting old alone without my loving partner sounds like hell."

    You know what else sounds like hell? All of those things but in a tin house being paid for by the Burger King paycheck.

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  • [–] 10 points 1 year ago

    One question I realize I need to ask: You said you want to marry someone rich. How much money would the partner have to be considered "rich" by your definition. $100k? $1M? $10M? $100M?

    Who says there won’t be love?

    Well, you made a post specifically about marrying for money and not one mentioning love. So you're saying you want to get married for money and love? I would think that's an even higher bar to overcome. I would think you'd face even tougher competition for partners that weren't even interested in the money, but would end up loving the rich partner for them in spite of their money. I'd think that would be a harder sell when you're indicating to this person that you're in it for their money.

    I’m sure there’s lots of competition. I never said there wasn’t. I just need to be the best somehow.

    There's the rub. So you'll have two very very difficult tasks ahead of you on this path:

    • Finding a partner that would be willing to marry you when they are agreeing its just for their money (which was your original premise)
    • Somehow being "the best" at whatever it is that partner is looking for when they have likely thousands of partners to choose from.

    Its not impossible, its just not very likely.

    This could happen in any relationship. The only difference is that you wouldn’t have benefited as much as you would have with the rich man.

    It happens in many relationships, yes, but what you were describing previously was a relationship based on money, not love. The difference is that if the attributes that made you attractive to the rich partner aren't there, and there was never love, then there would be little reason for the rich partner to keep the one that married just for money.

    Incredibly vague concepts. Things like “charisma” and “looks” are nice but I also care about the material and literal in a relationship.

    I wasn't talking about what you gain from the relationship, I was referring to what the rich partner gains. If the looks and charisma disappear (as they likely will with age), and those were the things that the rich partner married for, and they knew you just wanted the money (again, your original premise), why would they continue the marriage?

    I wish you luck in your path, but I would encourage you to have a second plan for a path forward. Plan A here isn't very likely or sustainable.

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