The USA only does Good Foreign Interventions, what are you talking about!?

Why, who could forget the wholesome Operation Gladio or the cuddly Jakarta Method?

Also never forget how the big bad Russians were coming for the smol bean innocent Unit 754 scientists, but they were heroically saved from any war crimes trials by Our Boys! Best of all, we made sure their "work" didn't go to waste and was expanded and used against civilians all over East Asia! Democracy!