I guess part of how I cope with the state of America is two things: I left (very privileged in a specific way), and I zoom out. I might not be fine in the end. None of us might, if I'm being honest. The American empire (the structures of power, money, and control itself) are probably doomed. The people are, in my mind, a completely different question. The ones that form communities, depend less on the empire in a thousand small ways, take care of each other - they will be okay. The ones who think they can make it with that unique American hyper-individualistic Horatio Alger myth in an increasingly global and interdependent 21st century world are going to crash and burn. That's what I cling to.
As for why nobody takes the shot, my parts are mixed. MAGA is a cancer that has probably already metastasized, but the big question is how much would killing one man boost that movement? Do you want to hand them a martyr? I feel sure Crooks was a patsy, it seems like that's what he wants, in his cowardly way. How much better for us all if he dies in his own fart cloud? I don't think anyone with the wherewithal to take the shot also can do the societal triage to figure out if he's more dangerous alive. A lot of people I've heard think Vance would be just the same as him but more effective. Trump absolutely believes that Trump is the shit, but Vance doesn't believe a damned thing. He played Trump's heel too long to win an election, but I think he would wield the office way more energetically than the old swine.
THEN there's the question of how to get rid of them at all. They've wasted no opportunity to signal an intent to steal the election. It is really hard to vote out fascists, and the fact that Americans managed to do it once, lived through a violent Beer Hall Putsch with actual dead cops and then voted him in again is just... How do you root for a country like that if you think that election wasn't also stolen? I cling to hope that it was, somehow. I've seen some mildly compelling evidence that Musk did it, but I'm not sold and I want it fully litigated out in the open before I call that one.
I hope things get better for you. I hope you can find more of your tribe locally and help each other more, without anyone else's permission. Mutual aid-style. But I also have resigned myself to just... Looking at the bigger picture. Under a literal microscope, almost everything manmade is hideous. Zoom out to see the beauty, only zoom in when it's with your people.