Piggybacking off jared, model good behavior when dealing with "big feelings". Give your son the language t describe his feelings and help him talk it through. Start with something like, "wow, it must have been really frustrating when you thought you were getting those toys and didn't. I would have been pretty sad about that too. Is that how you feel?" Then build on that over time. Start asking what he thinks should be done about it. It's going to take time, effort, and repetition. It will be painful for both of you, but talking about it out loud together through all sorts of scenarios as they happen will give him the tools and language to build emotional intelligence.
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