Don't worry fam, I have a guaranteed, proven, 3step plan to get your research funded.

Step 1: Create shell company.

Step 2: Create and market protein building protein bars with the ability to "create a compound interest effect" on your protein receptor cells.

Step 3: After company either makes money, is sued, or some combination of both, use the hype to generate interest in your theory as a new "longevity therapy that conventional science doesn't understand" and get the idiots that bought your protein bars to fund the actual research.

The plan is essentially guaranteed to work when it does.

Nah, we’re gonna “upload our brains” to computers – whatever that means.

It means, with any luck, we can do this with them: