... Yeah, no. Nothing I've said to you was meant for anyone else, and I doubt you're a day older than I, almost as much as I doubt any child who has escaped your clutches ever talked to you again.
Wait, are you still on that non-sense where calling it your article means calling you the author? If you struck me as someone capable of feeling shame rather than hoarding personal affronts not entirely for you like little treasures, I guess I could have called it "your source", but let's be real, that was never going to help you back to the support group you've stumbled out-of.
First three words of it were the location, by the way. Imagine thinking the average mid-town Los Angeles family has such a nice yard...
Obviously you're not the author, or your stanning of this non-sense shouldn't have dipped into such weak-sauce semantics. Pretending that's what I said was an amusing conceit though.