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And then everyone stood up and clapped (lemmy.world)
submitted 10 months ago by to c/programmer_humor@programming.dev
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[–] 119 points 10 months ago (13 children)

When there's a gold rush, don't find gold, sell the tools

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  • [–] 74 points 10 months ago (11 children)

    Nvidia has entered the chat.

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  • [–] 72 points 10 months ago (9 children)

    Your comment mentions NVIDIA. I'd like to invest $500000 into your comment. I only request that you immediately also invest the same exact quantity into my comment.

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  • [–] 33 points 10 months ago (7 children)

    That's not how it works and you know it.

    Here, they invest in my comment and pay for it with stocks of their comment, then I loan you money to buy their comment backed by my new position in their comment.

    We all then announce this massive growth in our comments, say AI at the end and line goes up, we all make loads.

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  • [–] 16 points 10 months ago (5 children)

    Thank you to coming to our annual shareholder meeting. We welcome all human and AI shareholders.

    This year, we've seen unprecedented growth in the number of times we've said "AI" on stage, largely driven by our investments in AI and our desire to talk about AI.

    In Q3 alone, our CEO said "AI" over 400 times, contributing to explosive stock value growth.

    Our Q4 was looking to be slowed down after our CEO lost his voice, limiting his ability to say "AI" a lot, but thanks to our AI capabilities, we used AI to generate an AI voice and AI video of our CEO saying "AI." Thanks to AI, we've finished the year with a valuation 300x the start, according to our AI analyst.

    Obstacles to continued growth include all words in the English language other than "AI." Also, after saying "AI" enough, "AI" stops sounding like a word anymore. AI. AI. AI. AI. AI. AAAAIIIIII. That's really weird. You know, that's another advantage of AI presenters. They can say "AI" so many times and just keep going. It doesn't affect them.

    In the next year, our AI R&D efforts are focused on seeing if more voices saying "AI" at once has a larger impact on stock price. We've created an AI chorus to chant "AI" at our next presentation and are very excited to see the results.

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