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Saying no (lemmy.ca)
submitted 10 months ago by to c/leathercraft@lemmy.ca
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I was wondering how you hobbyists say no to friends and acquaintances mostly. I have gifted a few small things and others just know that I do leather work.

I am getting inundated with requests and some are just way too much work. Of course they offer to pay but my time is limited and really I can’t even ask for a real hourly rate without out being prohibitively expensive. Especially when I have to design from scratch it takes me a ton of time.

I also would like to keep it a hobby and make when and what I want and not fulfill orders! I already have a side hustle I don’t need another one.

I was wondering how your experience is and how you handle this.

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[–] [S] 4 points 10 months ago (6 children)

I keep saying it but it doesn’t seem to click for people. I think it’s really hard to understand for some that not everything needs to be turned into money. Part of the problem probably is that I did turn a hobby into a business and that’s what they see.

And then there is the “oh I get that but as a favour for me” person. I am really struggling with that. They are friends so I feel like I should but how do you tell them that the favour is too “large”? I just got a request for something that probably would cost me 40-60 hours to make and I have zero interest in making an item like that. How do I say no without them feeling like they aren’t “worth” it? Or is that just in my head?

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  • [–] 3 points 10 months ago (4 children)

    Ah, man, that’s tough — I would struggle with the “as a favor” part too, and not wanting to come off as seeming selfish (when of course you’re not, you just don’t have the time/energy to devote doing projects for everyone else rather than for just you, which is the whole point). I wish I had better advice. Best of luck, you need your hobbies for you!

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  • [–] [S] 4 points 10 months ago (3 children)

    Thanks. I think talking about it helps. And the confirmation that it’s ok to have some hobbies for myself. I shouldn’t feel like I owe people.

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  • [–] 1 point 10 months ago* (2 children)

    Hey friend, sorry I misunderstood the original question. I still think a standalone page might help, but like you said, you really want to put a firm boundary down that this is for fun not open for commissions.

    Maybe something like "I'd love to be able to help with this request but since this is my hobby and not a business, I'm not equipped to handle requests like this". Feel free to chatgpt it more closely to your scenario, but I think a single sentence is probably the simplest thing you need here.

    Your boundaries are totally reasonable.

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