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[–] 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Dwight would be Artix. Michael would be Arch. Ryan, I think Manjaro, banished to the cupboard. The short-lived "I'm aware of the effect I have on women" manager would be Nix.

Jim is Debian, Pam is Mint, and (guy who was engaged to Pam and I can't remember his name) is Ubuntu.

Judgemental and sanctimonious cat lady might be Guix or GNU/Hurd, always on the others' ass about not being "free" enough. Kevin is either Gentoo or LFS.

And the warehouse staff, who actually get shit done, are the BSDs.

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