Peppermint schnapps, or Thunder 101 which is high proof. Makes your mouth smell like mint/mouthwash. Do with this what you will - which is end up in rehab if you're like me.

I knew a guy who kept a flask of whisky on him and would sip on it through the day while working at a hotel customer service/booking phone line. His revenue numbers were fine.

And if you take acid before work be warned miniature dragons will show themselves in your computer screen.

Holy shit. I just realised something from that day.

I was in a call centre on the phones.

Fuck what did i say to people???

Ka$h Money is that you?

Unfortunately, they do not. They just yell at you for sleeping at your desk and threaten to take away your bathroom privileges.

HR departments hate this one simple trick: turning Monday into a speedrun.

They might even tell you to leave early.

Lies