pardon me, sir, but this is illegal withou-

click

hey! Uncuff me! This is illegal!

car door shuts

Hey! Let me out of this car!

vroooooom

Where are we going!? You can't take me to jail!

arrives at jail

Dear family, they call this place prison, it looks like prison, and I've been issued what they're calling a "lawyer", but impossible as that may be considering they didn't have a warrant, I can only deduce that I've been kidnapped by a vigilante to a remote location pretending to be a prison!