but it's weirdly also pushed hard by hollywood & american television - anyone else noticed that?

Yes! A lot of american humor is based on tearing someone down. I cringe thinking back into my childhood when I participated in this type of behavior but thankfully i've stopped a long time ago. Still saddens me that a lot o people just don't mature out of it and keep behaving like this.

Also fuck negging and all the garbage that comes out of the manosphere. Bunch of insecure man babies