My dogs range from 4 to nearly 7 and I've been worried about them for three years

That's beyond sweet. I miss my dog still, and it's been over 15 years now.

Wild read tbh

"700,000gb worth of bandwidth in a day from an ai pulling a static image at 60hz, and retrying forever unless it got a 200OK reply"

That is a wild amount of web traffic goddamn